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Emotional stages of divorce

On Behalf of | Apr 10, 2023 | Divorce

The Holmes-Rahe Stress Scale places divorce as the second most stressful event that an adult may go through in life. If you spend time talking to divorcees in Texas, you may notice that most go through six emotional stages while getting divorced.


The first stage of divorce is usually denial. During this phase, you often blame yourself, so you may try even harder to please your spouse. Often, you condemn only yourself for all the arguments that you are having with the other person.


The second phase is shock. You may act very unnational and feel like you are in a constant state of panic. It is natural during this divorce phase to try to accomplish many things all at once.


When a person enters the third stage, they feel very confused. Expect to feel like you are on an emotional rollercoaster going from the feeling that everything will be OK to the depths of despair. Often, your actions will mimic how you are feeling. Some days, you may find it challenging to get out of bed while others may seem more normal.


This is the last stage where you see any hope for your marriage. You may make wild promises to your spouse to get them to change their minds. Towards the end of this stage, you will realize that you can only control your actions.

Letting go

Once you start letting go, you realize that both of you were at fault for the marriage not working. Therefore, you begin to fix your flaws so that you can look forward to a better tomorrow.


The last phase of divorce is acceptance. At this stage, you start to feel happy and satisfied with how life is going again.

Many people getting a divorce go through six emotional phases. Many people first go through a period of profound sadness before trying to save their marriage. Realizing things are not going to work out, they finally start making plans to move forward. Finally, they end up happy again and often discover their new life is better than what they experienced in their marriage.